Smuzzed

She scored a homerun with her guest appearance on “How I Met Your Mother” last week.  And now there’s talk that Britney Spears may get her own television show.

The “Gimme More” singer has reportedly received several offers for her own series, and her father (and co-conservator) Jamie Spears is weighing the options.

When traveling to a foreign land, observing all the cultural differences and traditions can be overwhelming.  And for Paris Hilton, it just may have caused her fall.

Preliminary reports suggested that the “Stars are Blind” singer suffered a nasty tumble at the hands of swarming paparazzi.  But now that the pictures have been released, it looks like it was a case of klutziness rather than harassment.

Dina Lohan started filming her new reality show Living Lohan and would have us believe her daily schedule consists of interrupting dance classes in the middle of Harlem. Riight. She, of course, does this while towing around her 14-year-old daughter Ali and her grandmother - allegedly. Poor woman probably was taken from a nursing home screaming "The orange devil's got me!" Which isn't far off considering Dina's days really involve eating infants then beating up homeless guys for change. Thanks to Ashley who would provide a safe and fire-crotch-free home for Grandma Lohan. In exchange for snickerdoodles.

I can understand how Benji Madden managed to score Paris Hilton. I'm not going to get into specifics but, it's because she has herpes. So how in the hell did he score a woman like Sophie Monk? She's looking pretty damn hot while shopping in LA over the weekend. Maybe Sophie was on a year long drinking binge while she was with Benji, I dunno. But if she ever wants to fall off the wagon, holla at your boy. I'll bring the homemade booze. What's your preference, baby? Pine-Sol Colada or Lemon Fresh Pledge with Streak-Free Shine-arita?

She missed her chance to see her incarcerated hubby after showing up late to the Pentonville prison last Thursday.

And it looks like Amy Winehouse was trying to make up for her tardiness by getting all dressed up for a Monday outing to see Blake Fielder Civil.

Miley Cyrus and family, including mom Leticia, sister Noah and her brother, aunt, cousin and grandma, all headed out for a Sunday afternoon service at their local church yesterday (March 30).

Following their religious outing, the Cyrus clan opted to take care of a few errands, including a bit of pampering at a nearby nail salon.

Surprise! Heath Ledger might have fathered a love child. His uncle broke the news to The Daily Telegraph which will undoubtedly make the estate bickering even more of a fucking fiasco:

Ledger was a 17-year-old schoolboy when he had an affair with an older woman who is thought to have only discovered she was pregnant after their relationship ended. The woman was living with another man at the time of the alleged affair.
Yesterday, Ledger's uncle, Hadyn Ledger said: "There is a very real possibility that Heath was the father."

Man, I wish I had a love child. A new one, that is. I'm getting kind of bored with the 203* I currently have. Also none of them refuse to engage me in armed combat. I even taped daggers to their bottles but, still, no dice. Wait. Can a three-year-old shoot a crossbow? Nah, the flaming arrow would throw off his aim. Or would it... *Give or take 203.

Fresh off an appearance at Nickelodeon’s Kids’ Choice Awards on Saturday night, Ashlee Simpson was spotted leaving Cafe Med after having a Sunday lunch with her bandmates at the popular West Hollywood eatery.

Meanwhile, rumor has it that the people over at NBC have declined to offer the Pieces Of Me singer a slot on Saturday Night Live to promote her new album Bittersweet World after her lip-synching fiasco back in 2004.

Kim Kardashian and her rag-tag bunch of family members stopped by Larry King Live on Friday. After getting peppered by Barbara Walters about her sex tape, Kim was ready for another awkward discussion about her nudity with the surprisingly alive. This time Larry brought up the topic of her shoot for Playboy. Kim said a bunch of words about something or rather, I dunno. I was too busy staring at the video of her getting ready for the shoot. Then things kind of went black for a while. I blame the fall into the next cubicle when I tried to mount my monitor. I should invest in some handlebars. I mean, I can't keep doing this 10-30 times a day - before lunch. Thanks to Lindsey who isn't afraid to say Larry's suspenders are sexy. Hell yeah!

In the midst of his booming movie career, Tobey Maguire still manages to keep first things first.  He was spotted over the weekend spending time with his wife and daughter… awww!

The “Spider-Man” actor looked cool and casual in a white t-shirt, jeans, and a pair of aviator sunglasses as he romped around with daughter Ruby and wife Jennifer Meyer at the park on Coldwater Canyon.