Smuzzed

Shortly after I cashed out on Friday thanks to a Charlie Sheen overdose, Mel Gibson appeared in court where prosecutors either gave him a slap-on-the-wrist plea deal because of the precedent they set with Chris Brown (You just read that.), or simply feared dying in a courthouse fire. Regardless, his only penance to society is Read More …

Here’s Lindsay Lohan arriving in court today where absolutely nothing happened besides the judge giving her another two weeks to contemplate a plea deal that would put her in jail for 90 days. But the important thing is she had a good time and an excuse to buy a new dress. I mean, just look Read More …

Thanks to the jewelry store selling the surveillance video of Lindsay Lohan allegedly stealing a necklace – on top of them now auctioning it off “for charity” – her legal team is going to pass on a plea deal that would’ve put Lindsay in jail for a short sentence. They believe they can prove the Read More …

Because California has a strict Keep Rich Women-Beaters Out of Jail policy (See here and here.), Mel Gibson struck a plea deal with prosecutors today where he’ll plead guilty to simple battery, but won’t face jail time and only has to attend counseling. His lawyer issued the following bullshit statement to TMZ that essentially asserts Read More …

For those of you hanging on to the extremely slim chance that Lindsay Lohan might be tossed in jail for her alleged jewelry theft, you can go back to waiting for her to run over a baby now. Apparently the jewelry store thought it’d be a great idea to sell the surveillance tape of Lindsay Read More …

Well, it’s the third Wednesday of the month which means Lindsay Lohan and her breasts sashayed into court for something or other. This time around, she’s rejecting a plea deal in her necklace theft case after the judge made it clear she will do jail time. However, TMZ believes Lindsay will ultimately accept the deal Read More …

With it becoming more and more evident that she’s going to duck grand theft felony charges – The jewelry store wants the whole thing to go away now. – Lindsay Lohan’s people have let her use Twitter again where she either wants us to know she’d never steal or is in the movie Greenberg. It Read More …

Seen here giving so much fuck our fuck-buckets have brimmeth over with fuck, Lindsay Lohan was arraigned in court yesterday (above) on felony grand theft charges for allegedly stealing a $2,500 necklace. I completely missed the entire courtroom hub-bub while out of town, and feel richer for it, but here’s the latest info in case Read More …

“But… but… I’m so pretty.”
Despite the fact her accuser suddenly refused to cooperate with police before falling off the face of the Earth – Read: Dina paid her off – Palm Spring Police announced today they have enough evidence to charge Lindsay Lohan with battery effectively putting her in violation of her probation. As if Read More …

“But… but… I’m so pretty.”
Despite the fact her accuser suddenly refused to cooperate with police before falling off the face of the Earth – Read: Dina paid her off – Palm Spring Police announced today they have enough evidence to charge Lindsay Lohan with battery effectively putting her in violation of her probation. As if Read More …