Smuzzed

- Selena Gomez is probably going to be arrested.
- Michael Lohan returns to his vagina-kicking roots.
- Sienna Miller crying over.. noodles?
- James Franco is Perez Hilton now.
- Adrianne Curry is still taking pics of herself.
- While Kelly Brook does it for a living.
- Lindsay Lohan might Read More …

So yesterday I posted some Emmanuelle Chriqui pics and a few people kept commenting that she looks like JWoww which I considered blasphemy and planned to prove every one of you bastards wrong. Turns out you were right.
I don’t even know what to say here, but if Japan wasn’t enough proof that God has forsaken Read More …

After searching her soul (Read: Seeing a whole lot of broke in her future.) JWoww has changed her tune on posing for Playboy now that she’s no longer worried about being a role model to eight-year-old aspiring graphic designers. No, really. E! News reports:
She said she decided to put it off after an 8-year-old girl Read More …

For years, Pamela Anderson has been a staple at Richie Rich’s Fashion Week runway shows where she brought a certain level of class and sophistication liken the world has never seen. However, this year, Richie has found a new muse in Jersey Shore’s JWoww which is really, just an inspired choice. Who better to carry Read More …

Because apparently the job requires both a massive fake life and tits, here’s Jersey Shore’s JWoww shilling for Ab Cuts at a New Jersey GNC yesterday which suddenly reminds me of my childhood in eastern Pennsylvania and so I must speak to you in italics:
As many did at the time, my family and I would Read More …

Seen here spraying her Ewok juices all over our nation’s proud naval tradition, Snooki and JWoww apparently have a spin-off in the works that continues the successful Jersey Shore theme of, “Everyone on this show is fucking retarded and a horrible blight upon society.” Which now that I think about it, also applies to Teen Read More …

Instead of contacting child services like a responsible adult, JWoww decided to retweet this photo of three young, impressionable children dressed up like the cast of Jersey Shore. Then again, I probably shouldn’t rule out that this is actually Snooki considering she looks to be about the same height. No, wait, that’s not cool. Now Read More …

Nude photos of Jersey Shore’s JWoww are in the hands of her former manager/ex-boyfriend which reportedly show the reality star before she became the stunning creature she is now. Her lawyers have been fighting to keep the pics unpublished, and now she’s decided to claim she was under anesthesia when they were taken which is Read More …

JWoww is currently embroiled in a legal battle with her ex Tom Lippolis, who has nude “before and after” photos of her on his cell phone, taken with her consent which makes them his copyrighted property that he can sell at his discretion. However, JWoww wants to avoid their release because apparently she’s not an Read More …