Smuzzed

Here’s Kim Kardashian shopping in West Hollywood yesterday where she clearly wasn’t spotted by her usual paparazzi because they took pictures of her ass that she somehow fit into leather pants. Although, I guarantee if she stayed in the sun long enough, you’d start hearing butter sizzle followed by the bell on Khloe’s collar as Read More …

Kim Kardashian premiered her single “Jam” on KIIS FM with Ryan Seacrest this morning, and it’s pretty much everything you’d imagine it to be: An auto-tuned, emotionless pile of vapid unoriginality that somehow manages to capture how annoying this whole family is and transform it into sound. Seriously, she doesn’t even sing. She just says Read More …

If any of you are near a loaded handgun and just looking for a reason, Merry Christmas? Via The Hollywood Reporter:
Since their arrival on E! in 2007, thanks to such no-boundaries behavior, the tightknit family has ably defied the laws of 15-minute reality TV fame while building a wildly profitable empire. As the cameras keep Read More …

- Marion Cotillard rounds out the cast of Inception 2: The Dark Knight Rises
- Justin Bieber’s fans act like little girls. Wait.
- Lady Gaga clues Anderson Cooper in on her creative process. Surprise! It’s drugs. Lots and lost of drugs.
- Jessica Simpson wasn’t invited to the Grammys.
- Prince Harry Read More …

These words are about to happen. Via Harper’s Bazaar:
“I worked out once. I gained like 10 pounds. All the papers were like, Kim’s pregnant! I ate the nuts on the street corner, the hot dogs, the street meat. It was not a joke.”
Haha. Nuts.
But, seriously, allow me to display my cultural naivety here, or possibly Read More …

- Jenny McCarthy is single again.
- Prince Harry bangs his girlfriend in the trunk of a Jaguar. As is royalty’s wont.
- Jeremy Renner uses his Oscar nods to get laid.
- Katie Perry’s breasts were on How I Met Your Mother. That’s why my TV kept turning itself on… (PUNS!)
- Read More …

True story. I went into this post with the intention of writing about Khloe Kardashian’s desire to fit into a bikini, only to stumble upon something even more ridiculous that also has no reason to exist. Via People:
“I’m in a working-out process, and I’m definitely back on trying to lose weight,” Kardashian, 26, told PEOPLE Read More …

Because there’s still people out there who genuinely believe Kim Kardashian is some sort of role model and not an ass mountain of whore lies, here she is entirely reversing her position on those nude W Magazine photos after pretending they lied and exploited her just four days ago. Us Magazine reports:
“Looking back, I love Read More …

Ever since Kim Kardashian was dragged into the Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubry custody battle, I’ve been amazed at how long it’s taken her to jump all over an opportunity to wedge her ass into the press. Then again, I always forget focus groups take a while. Anyway, here she is via Chicago Sun-Times:
I’ve learned Read More …

Whoops.
While Kim Kardashian spent most of yesterday pretending to be appalled by her “full-on nipple” that somehow magically appeared in W Magazine – Side Note: They’ve since inexplicably defended the shoot by calling it “art?” Oh, like Piss Christ. – she conveniently left out the part where she posed for the March issue of FHM Read More …